Trailers by Brandon
Trailers by Brandon is on fire this week. You’ve got to give it up to Hollywood for releasing this many trailers in the past seven days — we’ve got a whole thirteen of them to talk about this week. Granted, some of them are pretty bad, but some of them are surprisingly really cool?? Did anyone expect Hobbs and Shaw to actually look this good??
Opening this week:
I’m curious about Miss Bala but, truth be told, I’m not completely sold on it yet. The trailers have all suggested a somewhat interesting, somewhat clichéd revenge story that looks like some kind of mix between Mission: Impossible II and Haywire. Gina Rodriguez has my attention, but the negative reviews aren’t necessarily helping my confidence, either.
They Shall Not Grow Old
Peter Jackson’s ambitious WWII documentary that takes classic footage and puts it in modern-day might raise some ethical questions about the craft of filmmaking, but will probably be a pretty impressive feat nonetheless.
It’s a little frustrating that the studios have somewhat been burying Arctic (I’m not even sure if it’s opening anywhere near me this weekend), because I thought the trailers looked great. Mads Mikkelson (who I can’t wait to check out in Polar, which I haven’t watched yet) fighting a polar bear in the cold? Sign me up.
Hobbs and Shaw (Aug. 2, 2019)
Look, three minutes ago I thought I was completely done with the Fast and the Furious franchise. Then I saw this trailer and, for the love of all that is holy, I’m back in.
For whatever reason, Hobbs and Shaw completely nails what this franchise needs. Idris Elba is playing a super villain for God’s sake — no, not a bad guy who’s trying to end the world, but a literal bulletproof supervillain with super-strength powers (remember when these movies were just about jacking VHS players from semis)? And, as much as I hate to admit it, I’m here for it. Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham look like they’re having a blast on screen, and that translates through this trailer as this looks like a lot of fun.
The Hole in the Ground (March 1, 2019)
If it’s a horror movie and it has the A24 logo on it, you already have my money without even having to release any trailers. Hereditary, The Witch, Green Room (not to be confused with the cringe-worthy Green Book) all have brought me great joy and, from the looks of it, The Hole in the Ground will, too.
Donnybrook (Feb. 15, 2019)
Probably one of the bigger surprises this week, Donnybrook looks like a really intense, almost hyper-realistic drama with Jamie Bell and Frank Grillo. Honestly, that look on Grillo’s face at the end of the trailer is enough to sell me on this one, but I’m kind of loving the whole package attacked to Donnybrook.
A Vigilante (March 29, 2019)
The second trailer this week to in some way feature the sport of boxing, A Vigilante also looks like an intense ride lead by Olivia Wilde. I’m still giving the slight edge to Donnybrook just because that footage gives a greater sense of what that film is actually about, but trailers are remarkably interesting.
Birds of Prey (Feb. 7, 2020)
I know it’s early and they want to start building the hype for Birds of Prey (which, for the record, I am excited about), but this trailer seems a lot more like leaked test-footage than anything else. Again, I want to see more trailers and find out what’s really going on with Birds of Prey, as the hazy, R-rated vibe they tease in these twenty seconds really works for me, but I’m going to need more than this.
Nightmare Cinema (Feb. 14, 2019)
If I didn’t know any better, I’d swear that this was a student-made film. Yet, it’s partially directed by Joe Dante and stars Mickey Rourke, Richard Chamberlain and The Haunting of Hill House’s Elizabeth Reaser, maybe that’s just the vibe they were going for? Maybe?
The White Crow (2019)
Ralph Fiennes’ latest stab at directing could be really pretentious and bland, or it could be brilliant and a complete game changer. Based on this trailer for The White Crow alone, it’s pretty hard to tell.
The Secret Life of Pets 2 (June 7, 2019)
Not sure why Illumination is so gung-ho about releasing these character trailers instead of actually giving us some clue as to what The Secret Life of Pets 2 will actually be about, but, as was the case with all the other ones, this is fine and cute and all, even if we know nothing about the actual film.
Berlin, I Love You (Feb. 8, 2019)
This feels an awful lot like one of Gary Marshall’s later films, which isn’t necessarily a good thing. Valentine’s Day, New Year's Eve, Mother’s Day and, yeah, Berlin, I Love You seems like it’d fit right in there.
Drunk Parents (April 19, 2019)
Remember when Alec Baldwin and Salma Hayek dated for a while in 30 Rock? That probably would have made for a better movie than this. Despite a talented cast and a few chuckles, I knew we were in trouble when the trailer proudly announced this was from the writer of Grown Ups and Grown Ups 2. Like, weird flex, but okay.
Among the Shadows (March 5, 2019)
We’ve got three trailers that are ridiculously laughable and bad this week. The first is Among the Shadows. This is coming in on top of the other two just because it looks like a smaller, more intimate project that probably didn’t have a lot of money to begin with. Maybe everyone involved will go on to do great things someday, I don’t know, but this trailer *really* was a chore to sit through. Those glowing lights, awful cuts and poor line delivery? Trailers by Brandon says Oof.
A Dog’s Journey (May 17, 2019)
I first saw the trailer for A Dog’s Journey about a week ago when I was seeing The Kid Who Would Be King and nearly fell out of my chair laughing at this footage. They actually made a sequel to A Dog’s Purpose — which is a story about a dog who repeatedly dies and is reincarnated into other canines that are all owned by Dennis Quaid. Yes, you read that right, and yes, they really found a way to somehow continue that story in a sequel. Unbelievable, I tell you. Unbelievable.
Tyler Perry’s A Madea Family Funeral (March 1, 2019)
Hey, remember how Tyler Perry can show up in something like Vice or Gone Girl and actually give a good performance? Wouldn’t it be cool if he kept doing films like that instead of making trash like this? Trailers by Brandon hopes that someday he’ll get these God-awful Madea movies out of his system but, unfortunately, it doesn’t look like that day has come yet.
The Edge (1997)
Mads Mikkelson is stuck in the cold by himself in Arctic, which was also the case for Anthony Hopkins and Alec Baldwin back in 1997 with The Edge. Thing is, they had a bear to worry about too, which makes the whole movie all the more intense, fun and enjoyable.