Logan Paul may have redeemed himself a little bit in the eyes of the world.
In his first vlog since the scandalous Aokigahara Forest suicide video, Logan took the time to reflect and reach out on what suicide truly is.
The video opens to statistics on suicide with a voice over from suicide survivor, Kevin Hines who jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge.
"For 40 minutes, crying like a baby, bikers, joggers, tourists, runners, they went by me. Police officers looking for suicidal people went by me twice. I am standing at the edge leaning over the rail with tears flowing, looking down into the waters and I thought to myself absolutely nobody cares."
Logan spoke to Bob Forrest, founder of Alo House Recovery Centers who took him to task on his lack of experience with suicide. Ohio, where Logan's from, it's the second leading cause of death.
He didn't stop there. Logan went to New York City and spoke to Dr. John Draper, Director of the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. Dr. Draper talked to Logan about how the conversation about suicide needs to change.
The video goes back and forth between Logan's reflections as well as him talking about what he's learned. I encourage you to watch it yourself, reiterating will not have the same impact as watching. And if it means a few extra views for Logan, I will tell you it's worth it.
The first time I watched the video I cried. Kevin's story, which continues after Logan spoke the professionals, is painful to hear, painful for him to tell. "All I wanted was for one person to look me in the eyes and say, 'Hey kid, are you okay?'"
The suicide Logan filmed, how he put it out is not okay. That he was forced to remove the video himself was not okay. And right now, things with Logan are not okay.
However, he is trying.
I watched this video a second time with my children, one of whom is a fan of Logan's and has expressed her disappointment in his behavior. The merch she got for Christmas sits unopened on the floor - the pink hoodie that two months ago was all she wanted.
This time, I watched Logan. I noted his cropped hair, his unsmiling face and the utter professionalism from him, as well as his videographer. This video took time and thought - it took heart. This experience has irrevocably changed him. Hearing he had never known someone who had attempted suicide was a shock, it explains a lot about how things went down.
I was 13 when my best friend tried to kill herself. The video Logan posted of the victim, that went to children that age and younger. He has a mountain to climb to win back the parents of those children. I've been on many sides of the conversation, none of them is easy.
My daughters both said the video is a start. Pledging a million dollars to suicide prevention causes is another great step. Continuing this work, continuing to use the epic amount of influence that comes with being Logan Paul, that's now expected.
Many of the Logangsters, including my daughter, want Logan to go back to having fun. It's not that easy. As a mom, my heart goes out to him. He's 23, he's got a lot more to learn about life as well as death.
So to Logan, you are not alone. To anyone contemplating suicide, you are not alone. Together the conversation can change. Together things can get better.
To get help, call National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or text the Crisis Textline at 741741.